There are so many attractive, talented, ambitious women out there who all have one thing in common: They simply can’t find love.
While success and independence can scare a man off, Lucy Shahjahan, my guest this week on The Sigrun Show, says there is another reason why successful women struggle to find the right partner: They have lost the connection to themselves.
Lucy knows how this feels. Until she was 31 years old, the relationships she had lacked true intimacy and connection. She often felt numb and when a man would tell her he loved her, the first thing she thought was: Why?
When she saw a picture of herself, all dressed up but with a dead expression in her eyes, she didn’t recognise who she had become. It was her wakeup call. She decided to heal herself, to quit her job, and to say yes to her deeper calling.
In this episode, Lucy shares how she became a love coach, why highly ambitious women need to shift their attitude to find love, and how finding the right partner is connected to finding yourself.
Lucy’s insights are incredibly valuable if you’re struggling to find the One, or want to know how you can reconnect with your true self.
Are you more of a reader? Scroll down to read about finding the right partner and connecting to your true self.
What you will get out of this episode:
- How Lucy became a love coach (4:05)
- The point Lucy took action (10:12)
- Why highly ambitious women need to shift their attitudes to find love (17:07)
- Why you need to put yourself first and shift from the masculine to the feminine (25:32)
- What Lucy’s book I’m Done is about (31:18)
Want to dive deeper? Find out how to be successful in love and business at the same time or how I found love at a Tony Robbins event.
Finding the Right Partner and Connecting with Your True Self
In her work as a love coach, Lucy found that often, highly achieving women approach their search for a partner the wrong way. They show up with their CEO hat on, seek to tick off boxes or act disconnected from their feelings.
The belief that they need to work really hard to get something, or that their career needs to be on track first keeps them from finding love successfully.
If this sounds familiar to you, here’s Lucy’s advice on finding the right partner, and in the process, finding yourself:
Look at where your driving ambition is coming from
Go back to your childhood and understand what gave you your strong ambition. Could it be that you’ve always had to fight for recognition? Do you seek people’s approval when it’s really you who needs to approve of yourself? Do you constantly feel like it’s never enough?
Women often get let down in love because they don’t make themselves the priority. They’re over-working and over-delivering instead of prioritising self-love and self-care. The first step is to shift this attitude.
Start putting yourself first
The way you treat and speak to yourself is the way others will, too. After all, you attract who you are. If you’re not giving yourself what you need, how are you supposed to accept it from someone else?
Make sure what you do – in business and in your private life – aligns with who you are. Open up to your feminine side and start trusting yourself, your instincts and your feelings.
Create the space
If you keep putting everything else before and treat finding a partner as an afterthought, you’re going to miss out. You need to consciously create the space in your mind to receive your soulmate. Be certain that now is the time. Make it non-negotiable and don’t let excuses get in the way.
Are you struggling to find the right partner, or connect to your true self? I’d love to hear your thoughts. You can follow, connect and share with me on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.
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Connect with Lucy Shahjahan
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